Maybe I am supposed to stay forever alone. It’s pretty clear that there’s not much I can offer to anyone, and therefore it would be unfair to ask for anything in return. In return for what? Nothing?
Forever seems a long time though. Not to be alone, I think I can manage that… but to just exist. I could deal with few months, maybe even half a year. But a year, let alone several… it just seems way too much.
… and to everyone, I’m just “tired”.
Oh, and hello there my old friend SI. Been a while since last time. Didn’t really miss you at all, but here you are. Uninvited, as usual.
Deal → not exactly working right now
Distract → should try, but in reality I don’t want to
Deny → no possibility
Dissociate → never seems to work with this
Simply not being alone would most likely work, to some extent anyway (I guess for me that would be a form of denying)… but..